Rainy day and ?

I pretty much curse, I do try to control it, but today, it seems the only thing in my thoughts is Bleep, Bleep, awe screw it ass hole is the word!  I can not seem to get it off my mine.  To tell you the truth I really do not want to!  It is very significant to this day and the way I feel! Its raining and attitudes are flying and feelings are running amok, so I find it very appropriate for the day! I left my blog for a good hour to do quality work, which I have told you I love to do makes the day go by faster and you feel like you accomplished something.  But I still have that saying on my mine, and cannot seem to loose it!  How many times can a person say it!  Today seems to be a record breaker for me!  LOL. Do I mean it out of disrespect, no it is just a way to vent, maybe not the right way but today it is my way!

Old and restless!

LOL wish I could say young and restless, but it is what it is!!  Feeling big time like help me, I need something new mood!  Makes for a ruff day when you feel like that!  Good thing is it is almost 11:00 and soon I could eat my lunch and fill my face with my chili and cheese lunch! Protein at its finniest!
It is quite today, which makes for a long day, I need phones ringing off of the  hooks, people coming in non stop and just plain old excitement in my bones! Hate feeling this way, and I know it will pass, but getting really tire of it in the long scheme of things.  I think the feeling really is I want to feel usefull not useless, does that make sense to you!  

Start of a new week!

New rules will be and I state: I will have positive thoughts, no cares for other peoples attitudes or faults, their problems not mine. Worry about my state of mine and my health first and foremost! All that matters is the people I love which is a lesson I have learn from other peoples actions! Depend on myself and do not count on others to help!  Learned there is good in people but a lot more bad in people! Learned to give others chances to be the person you thought they were, learned the hard way, you can only give so many chances and in the end they are a lost cost and not worth the energy or the time!  Learned that there are a lot of haters in the world that wish you to your face lots of luck and behind your back stab the crap outta of you!
Did it take years of my life to learn these lesson, yes it did! Do I believe this , yes I do!  Do I want to go through the rest of my life with that feeling, no I don't, do I have a choice in the matter, no not really!  Do I ever think people will change, no I don't. Do I think I am perfect, not by a long shot, but I do know I purposely do not set out to hurt others, and make them feel useless and alone!  End of story!

Pathmark shooting in Oldbridge NJ

I always wonder as I am sure you all do, of what makes a person go over the edge and hurt innocent people!  Detail of the Pathmark shootings are coming out of how and what the people in the store were hearing and seeing!  You never think this could happen to you, you mine your own business you go to work and it is just another day, not ever thinking it could be your last! My son works in Shoprite, and you wonder of all the what ifs and the maybes that this would happen there! Who would have thought, in a movie theatre or a grocery store you would take you last breath on earth there!  What are the signs, what could have change the outcome of what happen to all those beautiful people.  The sad part is it happens, we feel for the families, our life's stay the same and they feel the lost the rest of their life's!  Time goes by days and years and people forget until it happens again!  They say to look for signs of mental illness, people saw signs a problem in the person who killed all those people in the theatre shootings but no one listened to them!  In the Pathmark case people have said he never got over his mom's death, is that a sign that he would kill people!  It is almost impossible to pinpoint something like this to be prevented!  I wish there was a way, but in all honesty, facts are you will never know from one day to the next if and when it could happen again to anyone of us! I now make sure when I see my son walk out the door to say I love you Rob, be safe, its pretty much a must for me to do that!  I taught him to lock the doors at home, I taught him to lock his doors at night when driving to work, I told him to put his seat belt on in car, I told him to never talk to strangers when he was young, but how do you tell them that you will have to watch out for a derange person at a movie theatre or a depress person who you worked with at a grocery store. How do you tell a child that?

Just say it!

Okay here it goes, politics is not my thing, I am a housewife, working women, and mom!  I add my little bit of earnings each and every week to put food on the table and some extra needed enjoyment for the family. I vote because its the right thing to do, do I believe what they say is always true, heck no!  Do you?  Promises are cheap to say and hard to keep, whether it be from a  Democrat or Republican.  I believe no one, at this point of the game and what month is it Sept.  November is right around the corner and I am very confused on it all!  Do I like Obama care, yes I think I do, I like that all people will have Insurance!  Am I partial to it yes I think I am, why do you ask because I have a 19year old son who will stay on my Insurance till he is 26 years old and I do not have to worry about him not having insurance. Is that selfish of me, no I think not!  Do I think anyone really cares about my opinion, I think they don't. Do I care if they care about my opinion the answer is heck no!  So as you could see, we all voice our opinions and ideas and thoughts, we all talk in circles, we all think we know everything, and we all think we are right!  Now do you really think that will change anytime soon, Hell no! Do you really think anyone cares, as fast as something is given to you is as fast as it is taken away!  Do I know what I am saying, no not really, like most people who talk about politics very seldom do? Do I care what you think because I said it, heck no! Whats the phrase (freedom of speech). What I care about right now, is making ends meat, while the Democrats and Republicans go at each other with loads and loads of bull crap to get people like us to vote for them!  Than we vote, and we get a winner, than we wait, and wait, and than we are back to the same place we left, the four years pryor blaming the other party for not being able to get out of the hole we are in and we need more time! Okay how much time do you need?   Does it ever end, HELL NO!!!!!!

Mums (plants)

Tis the time of season to go look for mums and get ready for fall.   The place where I always go to buy them decided to close their doors and homes are being built!  Bummer for sure!  Now I have to find a
place that sells huge ones.  Tomorrow me and the hubby will begin our journey for the perfect ones. LOL  The past few days my mood was so so, meaning not good!  I very seldom wake up on the wrong side of the bed but I must of fell flat on my face off the bed and popped up to continue the days in rear form.   Now today however, I am getting my personality back which is a good thing for my family LOL. Do you ever wonder what makes a person get in a mood so bad, which is really not in their character at all!   I do, all the time, I should go see someone and talk about what bothers me and maybe they could find out what is the stem of the problem.  I have a feeling I know what it is so that is why I pretty much do not bother wasting time on the situation. I have two choices deal with it or move on.  What do you recommend?   I know you can not answer, mainly because you do not know the problem which I cannot say!  Don't you just love people who talk in circles!  That should be my middle name, I am getting pretty damm good at it!  Later all, weekend is upon us, and let the happy mode begin!  Mums here I come!

Totally You!

That's the way you have to think sometimes, you have to make time just for yourself, so you do not disappear into the wide yonders of the hemisphere.  I decided to take control of my own destiny and get things done my way!  I need something new and I plan on getting it!  Everything I needed to get started is in motion, now it is a waiting game of getting the calls and to go see my first client!  The first of everything is always the hardest than it all becomes easier as you move along! Whether it is totally me or totally you, no matter your age, it is all up to you to begin anew!  Think now, think future, think I can do it! I have finally said this is my time and I want to expand my horizons and to make changes and try new things. This time I am finally listening to my heart and not thinking of the what ifs any more!