Do you really care!

Hi my friends , sorry been so busy with running around and all, that this was very first time I have a chance to just breath!  I went to a college game in Delaware and had a great time on Sat. my cousins son did great!  Great weather for the tailgate party with family, was a lot of fun to reconnect with everyone! Did I tell you that, don't think so, having a senile moment, lol!  My 30th wedding anniversary was yesterday so we went to a nice restaurant called Autoro's in Maplewood NJ. They have all organic bread and cheeses and the best pizza!  They have this appetizer which is their own homemade bread with ricotta cheese and a drizzle of olive oil that was to die for!  They have a lot of specialty pizza pies, the one we had was called (shoot I forget) but everything on it was fresh tomato and mozzarella and all seasonings were fresh!  Awsome, for sure but because of Lapband I only had 1/2 of slice of pizza and 3 bites of the bread! Enough to wet the pallet so to speak!  Going on 3 years with band so do not feel sorry for me, I am really use to it by now! Lets say I never walk out of a restaurant over stuffed. LOL gotta go, till next time love to all!

Tossed and turned!

Had a great weekend and Sunday morning slept in late, the problem was Sunday night, all I did was dream of loved ones gone and tossed and turn all night! The good news is all I dreamed of was the people I loved and cared about the most, this blog is for them. My grandfather, the first man I ever loved with his warm smile I will never forget, My grandmother, who I cried for days on end knowing I will never see her in this lifetime again, My mom, my greatest supporter who loved me for me and was there for us all the time, God let you stay with us till we were grown and with families knowing we would be okay! My father-in-law, had a stern look but was there for you whenever you needed him. My sister-in-law Patty, a quite soul with a heart of gold, gone to soon, Mr Baird a big part of the family who would tell his jokes and make everyone laugh, even if he told them a million times, My dear Aunt Connie, she would be there for me in a minutes notice if needed and her Birthday calls to me each and every year to say Happy Birthday Fran, and to my Father, to all the what ifs and the could have beens if all was different in our lives!  Tossing and turning was okay last night I was with those I loved and missed the most in this world, the tears flowed even in my not so sound sleep, I know this because my pillow was wet with tears!

The to do list!

Love when my to do list is complete and job well done, well at least to me it is well done! LOL  I love when I accomplish what I set out to do, at work or at home, the same feeling no matter what!  Getting myself mentally ready for a busy weekend to come.  Going to Delaware to see a college football game, first of the season for me.  Fall and football is a great combination, you have to agree!  Lots of running around with family and friends makes my days and life complete.  I was feeling in such a slump for the last few weeks, so glad it has passed and if you ask me why did I feel like that, lots of reason but in all honesty it really was not in my control!  My Husband most of the time stays out of things but he saw how it was affecting me and decided to get involved. He told me you do the best you could do with what you have, that is all you could do, I decided to listen to him, (which is really not often, lol) so glad I did!  Thank you hubby of mine of almost 30years come Oct. 9,. I might not tell you I love you very much but I do! My Italian crazy ways, I am sure drive you nuts, but you stuck with me though thick and thin and that is all that matters!  Five to six years from now you and I will sit together on a bench watching the waves roll in at the Jersey shore if faith allows!

Its ruff when?

When you have a husband that gets right to the point, for example I am the type that takes each day as it comes and make plans in advance and age is not on my mine unless brought up to me!  I find with my hubby that when age comes up he will come out and say things like , you have only 20 good years left, or that you are over the half way mark.  I am 56 years old and I feel better than I did at 30, now that's how I feel, him on the other hand(by the way he talks) acts and I am sure feels a whole lot older and he is going to be 50. Why else would he always talk about age if he felt great!  I exercise and take vitamins and run around like a chicken with out a head 24/7. I plan for the future because you know what, I have one no matter how short or how long it may be, I will enjoy it till my last dyeing breath so help me God!  When I was a kid I would sit there and calculate how old I would be in the future, I would say the year 2000, I would sit there and figure out how old I would be that year, half the time I thought I would be dead already, lol (remember I was just about 12 yrs old or so at the time). I learned as time goes by not to worry about it and take each and every day and love life, now if only I could do that for the hubby and get him out of the doom and gloom mode all would be good!  I plan on being around for a while and hope he is up for the ride!

Debate time!

Tonight the big debate we are all waiting for!  The who could out talk over one another and who will have the biggest personality! I just hope that does not overpower the issues on hand and the problems this country already has! We need help and fast, we do not need promises that will not be kept!  We need things done not talked about!  Who do I think will come out ahead, not a clue but I do know that promises do not cut it any more and getting it done does!  My son is register to vote, for the very first time, he has his own view's and is not swayed by my myself or his fathers view's and that's the way it should be! This is not a baseball team or football team that happens to be your parents favorite and because your child grew up knowing only that, it becomes theirs also!   This is the future of the country and his or your child have a right to their own opinion,  as it should be! I will pay attention, will I think that this debate will really matter in the long run!  You tell me, has it ever matter before!  Sometimes yes most of the times no!  Talk is cheap, well not really because in the long scheme of things the people, we being the people pay for it!

Teaching myself!

I am trying to teach myself how to stay calm and relax. I am so tired of feeling like I have all the worries in the world, when in all honesty it should not be my worries at all!  I have been going to physical therapy for a back problem and when the therapist does my shoulders and neck he said it is so tight and knotted up! Its pretty much the stress of the day that brings it on!  After he massages my neck for about 10 min. I feel so much better only to have it return and be just as tight the next time I see him.  So now I am trying to stay calm, cool and collected no matter!  I sometimes feel like I am a heart attack waiting to happen!  I want to nip it in the bud, of course before it does happen, but lets say I don't and it does and I live through it to survive, changes in my life really will happen I promise you that! Of course if I do kick the bucket at least you will know what I was thinking that "being all the should haves and could haves and the why didn't I's ". LOL

Change of plans for college!

My son Rob decided to change his major in college to Physical Therapy, which I think is a great idea with a big (huge demand) out there for therapist .  He will finish his 68 credits at UCC than proceed to go to Kean or Montclair University to continue to get his Masters, with luck I hope he will continue with getting his Doctorate! We shall see time will tell with the Doctorate part of it!  My husband and myself are really glad on his decision!  Of course his dream is be in Law enforcement and he will continue his quest for that! He said Physical Therapy is his back up plan.  I still think it is the other way around but once again time will tell that also!  He goes to school each and every day with no drama and his focus is amazing to me!  I expected a lot more of negativity on his part, which I am so glad did not happen! The truth is  (as I see it)  when you want to succeed and be successful you can, my son Rob is showing me that anything is doable as long as you want it bad enough! He wants it very bad, and he is pushing full stream ahead!  He is so unlike me in that respect and I am so glad he is the way he is!  He truly is making us very proud parents!